sissy friendship thing

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" things that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this - just the stone cold truth of the great friendship.

When you are sad I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad. When you are blue I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. When you smile I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in. When you are scared I will nag on you about it every chance I get. When you are worried I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining. When you are confused I will use little words. When you are sick stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have. When you fall I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass. This is my oath ... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask; the answer is; "because you are my friend". That’s why they say,

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.